I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
