Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
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