ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
why is half of my head shaved?
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