someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"