last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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