Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
operation harelip BJ is a go
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
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We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
did i walk over a car last night?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
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There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?