he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He shit in the fireplace
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
