they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize