I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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