and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
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New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
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Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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