All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
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