Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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