is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
My dick has a subreddit
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
