did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"