bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize