the new term for farting is butt boxing.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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