Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
