hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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