You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
