i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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