At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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