This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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