The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize