she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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