Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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