"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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