This is not my ceiling
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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