I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
