im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm like, not good at living.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize