id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
When are your genitals available?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
