Small penises have feelings too.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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