i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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