I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
