guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
