Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.