i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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