She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
