What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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