Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
