I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
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