if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
