It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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