I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.