I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize
