How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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