She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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