stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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