I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize