Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
