He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I think people are normalizing furries
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
