i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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