This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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